I’m Afraid to Ask for a New Name
–Ready for a Change
I wish I could start by giving you a hug! I also wish I knew if you have a particular reason to believe your parents would get mad at this request. Are they prone to anger? Or is it possible that you are torturing yourself unnecessarily by imagining the worst? Could your anxiety be playing a role?
Many kids your age are hesitant to talk honestly with their parents. And yes, some parents fly off the handle easily, or are too controlling. But many would love to help if their kids would confide in them. They are well-meaning and want you to be happy.
That doesn't mean an automatic "Yes" to your request. After all, you are still pretty young, and your feelings about your name could change again as you get older. So be prepared for some resistance or hesitance on the part of your parents. Know that this doesn't necessarily mean they are angry with you or will never agree to your suggestion.
Do you have another adult that you can confide in, like a teacher, aunt, or therapist? Perhaps that person could help you come up with the right words and a strategy to approach your parents. You might even start with a simple inquiry about how they chose your name, followed by your confession that you just don't feel that the name suits you.
Then you could bring up the new name you've chosen, along with why you like it and how committed you are to it. Let them know how much thought you have given this. I hope you are surprised by their willingness to hear you out.