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Is This Boy's Name Right for My Girl?

I recently found out I am expecting a girl, and I love the name Evan for her. I have tried to consider other names, but they all fall flat. I know that boys' names on girls are hated by many and are trendy now. Still, I can't shake Evan for this little girl. My sister and I both have masculine names, so it's not really uncommon in my family. My husband's family will think this is a bigger deal. What do you think? Should we go with it or avoid the conflict?

–Lovin' Evan

While Evan is a traditional men's name, its style—light, trim, and modern—crosses genders pretty fluidly these days. And Evan itself has been given to American girls at the rate of about 100 a year for decades (since the 1980s). So for most audiences, it should go over just fine.

I do wonder, though, about your concern for the one particular audience: Your husband's family. What’s going on there? You're bracing for conflict, but you haven't told them the name yet, nor have you mentioned how your husband feels about Evan. What is his opinion here? Does he like the idea too?

If he does, then it's really his job to back you up, help sell them on it, and work to resolve any conflicts that may arise. This is a decision for you and your husband to make together, and to support each other on. That means he has to be fully in on the choice, of course. Once you're secure in that, you can feel secure in giving your baby the name that you love—without caring what other family members might think.

Comments

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July 10, 2017 9:56 AM
By Anonymous (not verified)

I agree, dealing with any issues from husband family should be handled by husband. Since you & your sister both have masculine names, I think it'd be fair for him to make the argument that it's somewhat of a "tradition" in your family, and that you'd like to carry that on. Then husband can simply make it clear that no further discussion is going to happen.

The other option would be to wait until the baby is born before announcing her name. Sometimes people will keep their negative opinions to themselves if it's clear that it's too late to change the parents mind. It also helps when the name is attached to an actual baby and not just a hypothetical baby.

All this is assuming your husband likes the name as much as you do. Have you talked to him about it? If he doesn't care for it, you'll need to pass on the name-at least for this baby.

July 10, 2017 10:31 AM
By Anonymous (not verified)

Do both of you like the name and want to use it? That's all that matters. His family doesn't get to choose the name and there is no reason you need to tell them until after she is born.

July 10, 2017 3:10 PM
By Anonymous (not verified)

I think you know this is sensible advice already, and asking here on Name Candy I should think it would be helpful to have been given a little more fact and research info... One good thing established is that there are one hundred girls a year named Evan. People also get around this kind of thing by spelling it more creatively to make it more feminine etc. But if you're worried about trendiness yourself, you could look in you or your husband's family tree and see if there is one Evan that could spark a connection. Just off the top of my head I think names that sound like they live in the same camp: Yvonne, Ava, and Evelyn. Even though one name I liked was a bit of a risk I still said when she's in my arms I would decide and kept another on the table until then. :) And it made me all the more confident when we decided to go with the original name anyway. Congratulations!

July 11, 2017 2:54 PM
By Teddy (not verified)

The name isn't the problem here. Evan is a pretty name. I remember hearing a lot of people liking it as a nick for the ultra feminine name Evangeline. I think if you and hubs like it, stick with it. Surprise family AFTER Evan is already born and perfectly fits her name.

July 20, 2017 1:52 AM
By Anonymous (not verified)

Another alternative, if you want it to be more feminine, would be Evani

July 21, 2017 4:50 PM
By C (not verified)

Have you ever considered that you subconsiously like the name Heaven, but don't think that will work and that's why you chose Evan (and other syllables in front sound funny--leaven?!) Keep experimenting with the sound before committing. Look up the raindrop names on Baby Name Wizard blog. I typed in Heaven on the blog and saw Eden as an alternative. I typed in Evan and saw Evangeline (Evan could be a nickname and if it bothers her she can go by Evangeline or Evie). You might like it but she might hate it, of course that's true of any name, but Evan is going to get a lot more questions than normal. What about Epony (I think that's it) from Les Mis? If Evan is it, parade it in front of his family with pride and not hesitation or they'll see an opening for an argument.

August 30, 2017 3:49 PM
By Anonymous (not verified)

Your daughter will be mistaken for a man her entire life. She will get mail addressed to Mr. Evan. Teachers will think it's a boy student. Why do that to a daughter? Sorry, I don't get it. Case in point - I know a boy named Erin. He gets mistaken for a girl all the time, until they meet him of course. Silly choice for a boy.

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